That’s it.

I’m done.

I’ve finally given up sugar.

No more two or three extra teaspoons with my morning, afternoon or evening tea. No more top-up-for-my-chocolate-milkshake while watching movies with the kids. No more teaspoon here, teaspoon there for the occasional coffee. 

I’m done. Kaput. Da finale. Das Gone. 

I had the worst ever morning training session today and I blame it all on sugar. I think I downed about 3 cups of tea yesterday and topped it off with another cuppa for The Covenant (great movie by the way) around 9pm.

That, plus the additional three packets of crisps I had with the kids (while watching Peppa Pig) last night eroded all stamina from my usual punchy 3-mile-climb.

Gone.

I was puff-t’d!

I was drained. 

I was huffing and puffing as if I weighed 300lbs, and even the casual 3% climb felt like 12%.

“What the HELL happened?”, that was a cuss at 3%.

“What is this?“, 6% when I knew I was damned.

“What the f*$£!??” was when I lost it at 9%. Cursing and waving arms at bars cos’ I couldn’t see straight. Glasses were all steamed up and covered in sweat. 

“What is this?”

I have never, ever experienced climbing fails like this.

Never, never – ever.

The drivers in cars that were trailing back watched on as though they felt sorry for me. No horns or shouts. They just followed far behind watching a slow horror show unfold.

Fat dude on a bike, doing 2 miles an hour up a hill.

There wasn’t not a close pass in sight.
All ‘em cars stayed far behind as if they were in a trance.

I guess I caused traffic today. That and maybe an earthquake when I farted at 9%.

I’m pretty sure those commuters are still laughing at their desks at this very moment. Sold on the thought of watching my fat ass bouncing up and down the saddle like a jack rabbit.

Maybe a jerk rabbit.

Sorry. 

I blame the crisps.
Crispy Bacon Wheat Crunchies.

Three of them. 

Above all, I blame myself. For giving in to temptation and washing off those salty crisps with gallons of sugary tea. 

I let myself down. 

So I’m done. 

F*** sugar!

No more sugar, cos’ I know that getting back in shape from this moment on will be a pain in the ass – literally.

This is so bad I might get recurring saddle nightmares tonight. Cos’ todays’ morning cycling session was painful. Almost to the point at which I thought about walking that climb at 9%.

But I didn’t. 

I dragged my fat legs up that hill and kept the wheels spinning.

Cursing, but spinning.

F*** this. F*** that.

All I know is I still gotta do this all over again this evening, tomorrow…and the day after.

F***

Love is pain.